I love you! Leia, I know! Han Solo

Sunday 8th November 2015 will forever be etched on my memory, it was the day that changed the course of my life and the day I became ‘saved’.

Let me take you back a little bit, I was married to a lovely man who we shall call Edwardo. I was married to Edwardo for 15 years (we had ups and down throughout our marriage but that’s another blog post for another day) and in May 2014 is the month and year my marriage kinda started to fall apart by November we broke up and what followed over the next year for me was horrible, moving from one place to the next, sleeping around, spending all my time and money in the pub to try and take away the pain I was feeling, not only through drinking but by the sleeping with lots of different horses (as the great Robbie Williams once sang).

I had signed up to a website which I won’t mention here or the type of website but let’s just say, it wasn’t a conventional dating site in the May of 2015 and I had met lots of different ‘horses’ but I was becoming detached from life and I was starting to go down paths that scared me.

Each Sunday on the forum of this website I would comment on the dating thread, never getting a date and I was starting to give up hope, I didn’t necessarily want a boyfriend but wanted more than what I was getting, so when this chap messaged me asking me out on a proper date at the end of October and despite the distance I said yes, he lived in Essex and I lived in Kent, he didn’t drive but he was determined to come all the way to see me on the train. It turns out we had both been looking at each other’s profiles for a while but never really had the courage to message each other, until that Sunday night.

Anyway back to 8th November, I stood on the train platform and he gets off the train and there he is, his massive smile and a box of chocolates, he comes over to me and we say hello, he grabs hold of me and we kissed, we kissed like I had never been kissed before, we were still kissing ten minutes later but it felt like the most natural thing in the world.

The date went well and he asked me out like a couple of teenagers would and I accepted, he went home and the next day we both told each other we loved one another, we both wanted to say it but as we had both been hurt in the past and we had only seen each other once for a couple of hours, we both knew and we both said we were scared to say it but I’m glad we did.

Over the next week or so I got cold feet though, I started to panic at the distance and scared of the feelings I was developing, I didn’t want to get hurt again but through his persistence and his rear end, here we are all married and happy.

That website and he saved me.

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